Answering the Guy Questions: Chapter Three

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Chapter Three

Unlocking Your Feminine Power

As women, we have a far greater power over the course of masculinity than most of us realize. We can use our femininity to influence men toward strength or toward weakness. Unfortunately, most of us don't use our feminine power correctly. We nag, criticize, complain, manipulate, and seduce--hoping that our self-built techniques will somehow work some magic and turn a frog into a prince. But when selfishness is our motivation for changing guys, we only end up fueling the problem and leading men into even greater weakness. Just like there are counterfeit versions of masculinity, there are counterfeit forms of femininity--twisted imitations of God's original design for womanhood. Sadly, most of us are very well-practiced in the counterfeit versions.

Let's take a closer look at some of the most common ones.....

one. arrogant femininity

...arrogant femininity in not Christ-built femininity. It's a twisted counterfeit of our feminine power--using our words to paralyze and defeat men rather than set them free to become valiant warrior-poets. As women, we are created to build men up, not tear them down. Rather, it means that we motivate guys to raise up to the standard of Christ through words and attitudes of encouragement instead of disgust.

two. nagging femininity

As we allow the Spirit of God to transform us into radiant examples of Christ's love, guys will be transfixed rather than turned off by our behavior and attitude. They will be won over to the ways of Christ simply by observing the beauty of Christ that exudes from us. A nagging or criticizing spirit quenches the power of Christ's Spirit within us, but a quiet, prayerful, reverent spirit brings true Christ-built feminine beauty to the forefront. When guys come face to face with stunning Christ-built radiance, they can't help but evaluate their own behavior in light of it...

three. seductive femininity

We cannot glorify God by flirting, flaunting our body, or using our seductive power to win the approval of guys. We don't draw attention to Christ through selfish manipulation and sex-appeal--that only draws attention to ourselves and brings guys down. If we want to see a positive change in the animalistic attitude of today's men, it's time we stop catering to the problem. It's time we begin to live as if we actually are the holy temple of the Most High God.

four. controlling femininity

...for a guy to become the warrior-poet that God intends him to be, he must be set free to be a man. In a marriage that means he's allowed to be the leader. He's given the position of final decision maker. It means that his wife allows him to guide and direct their relationship, their family, and the spiritual climate of their home. That does not mean that the woman has no say in any of these areas. On the contrary, a women's input and influence in a marriage and family are crucial parts of God's design. Whenever a woman is told to "get in her place" and given no voice whatsoever, that's a very clear sign that things are grossly out of balance. However, when a woman usurps authority over a man, diminishes his voice, and manipulates him into doing everything her way, that's an equally unhealthy picture. 

It may be hard on your fleshly, selfish side to give up control and let a man take the lead. But in the end, it's far more romantic. After all, what girl dreams of being a gritty, iron-fisted princess who rescues and trembling, wimpy, weak-minded guy from the dragon, carries him away to her kingdom, and tells him exactly how to think and act from that day on? Doesn't sound much like happily-ever-after material to me! In our hearts, we don't want a "yes, dear, whatever you say, dear" kind of guy. We want a strong man who we can admire and respect. So let's not rob men of their masculinity in a childish battle for control.

Don't underestimate what God can do through one young woman who stands for His Ways. Warrior-poets can be awakened in this generation. So why not let the revival begin with you?

~Leslie Ludy